I Surrender
by princex
Summary: Shadow just wants some peace and quiet, but Amy has other ideas.


"Shadow, I'm bored…"

The comforting silence that Shadow was relishing had unceremoniously broken. He frowned, his eyes lazily wandering to see the pink hedgehog lying restlessly near the edge of her bed, upside down, arms dangling, legs kicking into the air as if to fight the boredom she was complaining about.

Shadow had been perusing a rather interesting novel, one that delved into the selfishness of a love which could not be destroyed by mortal means, which could only be severed by death. He had made much progress…when unfortunately, _unsurprisingly_, his girlfriend had to interrupt the relaxing stupor.

Why couldn't she sit still for more than five seconds? He was certain that the calm atmosphere of her own room would also soothe her tireless spirit. Yes, Amy had framed her room around the ideal of perfect comfort and harmony, with soft accents and decorations to match her person. Shadow himself was lounging in a cozy armchair across from Amy's multi-cushioned bed.

It wasn't fair, she thought. Shadow knew how restless she was, especially on days like these! Amy could see a bright sun encompassing the world outside in its warmth from the corner of her right eye; Shadow knew she loved to have all kinds of fun in the sun! How could he be so selfish?

Her boyfriend decided not to respond to her plight. Shadow was mentally exhausted from his work; GUN sure knew how to plow him through the dirt with their extensive assignments…and every time he was graced with days off, Amy insisted on dragging him all around the world, or so it seemed to him in his worn state. Was it so selfish to request some peace and quiet every now and then?

Amy gave him her signature pout. At this moment, everything about him annoyed her: the casual way he had his legs crossed, the way the plush armchair he was resting in looked as if it was about to swallow him whole, his goofy reading glasses (who knew the alleged Ultimate Life Form would need glasses to begin with?) with their wiry frames, how his entire face scrunched up as he immersed himself once again in his book… _Actually, he's kind of cute_, she thought.

She softened ever so slightly. He still annoyed her, of course.

"Shadow…did you hear what I said?"

Shadow tried to remove himself from her fussiness…to no avail.

A lacy pillow soon flew across the room, its target reached.

Amy giggled, far too amused, when a quite disgruntled Shadow, glasses thrown off his face, the page he was currently reading lost, rose from his seat and approached her.

Hoping that his looming height did a number on her, he growled, "And what exactly did I do to deserve that?"

Too bad for Shadow, Amy was rarely frightened by Shadow's "tough guy" act, mainly because she knew his true nature, for which he went lengths to hide.

"Well, for ignoring me, of course! Just look at how nice it is outside!" Amy motioned to the window at the far wall, which she had gazed at longingly for a while.

"Didn't I tell you that I wanted to…_unwind_ today?"

Amy tilted her head quizzically. She studied him intently; what she hadn't noticed before, looked painfully obvious now. Shadow seemed completely exhausted: she could see it in his eyes. Amy had always wondered if GUN was pushing him too hard…Ultimate Life Form or not, he could still get tired, right? She suddenly felt guilty—although he hadn't told her directly, it was her _duty_ to notice these things, as she was his girlfriend!

At times, Amy could be considered obsessive in her mission to be the "perfect girlfriend" to Shadow. She simply felt that their relationship was too good to let slip so easily; sure, it was her first relationship, and she was only fifteen years old, but she was certain that Shadow was the perfect one for her! Of course, she refrained from telling him any of this, for fear of coming off as she used to with Sonic. It wasn't obsession, she told herself, but passion. She despised casual relationships with all her might, for love wasn't a casual affair.

Either way, Shadow meant a lot to Amy, ever since they became close after he decided to save the Earth from the Biolizard because of her words. It was more intrigue than anything else at first, for both of them; in Shadow's case, he couldn't fathom how a girl he had only just met reminded him of the one he had lost, his best and only friend, and of her true wishes. As for Amy…she had seen, in his moment of clarity, a kind and troubled soul, a side of him which was unknown to most others. Amy had a natural talent for seeing the best in people, and it prevailed even in the direst of circumstances.

Yet Shadow continued to interest her; they became friends, Amy his confidant, and Shadow her partner in crime, so to speak. Whatever exploit she devised always satisfied his many curiosities concerning life as Amy Rose idealized it to be, even if it was as simple as looking for the best ice cream in town. Amy's laughter and excitement were certainly invigorating, even for Shadow.

And so eventually they became romantically involved, as Shadow frequently said. When he used such verbose terms, Amy could never help laughing. That was one of the many things she liked about him.

"Amy, I believe _you_ are the one ignoring me, now."

The lovestruck girl snapped out of her reverie and focused on her boyfriend still standing before her, now with his arms crossed in annoyance.

"Oh…sorry, Shadow, I was just thinking."

"About?"

Amy became sheepish, as she usually did when accosted like this, especially when the very subject of her thoughts was Shadow himself.

She shook her head as if to banish the thoughts from her mind. "Nothing important! Hehe…anyway…" Amy put her index finger to her lips, her eyes dashing back and forth as she tried to devise a solution to their current predicament. Amy wanted to go outside, and Shadow wanted to stay inside and relax. Perhaps she could compromise on going outside, but what entertaining thing could she do indoors, while also satisfying Shadow's desire for peace?

Suddenly, she had an idea, but she wasn't sure if Shadow would take it. Amy felt a bit guilty; what she had in mind was an activity she had dreamed of doing for so long, the very sort of activity Shadow was still timid toward. "Hey, Shadow, I think I came up with something that we'd both like!" A bold faced exaggeration, but she wanted to catch his attention.

Shadow arched an eyebrow. "Yes?"

"Um…well…" Amy became sheepish once again. "I know you aren't 100% comfortable with this kind of thing, but…we could…" Amy just decided to spit it out before she decided against it. "We could cuddle!"

Once she had suggested it, Amy felt an all-encompassing urge to crawl into a hole. What was she thinking? Shadow barely hugged her! How could she expect him to be so close to her, to hold her for so long? And then she sounded so childish, using a word like "cuddle!" Amy knew she had ruined her relationship with Shadow, she had a strong, pervasive feeling that it was over…

"What does that mean?"

Amy's head shot up, desperately looking for a sign that Shadow wasn't about to break up with her. When she processed his question, she only felt more nervous.

"Uh…it's like…being in bed with someone you really like, and…holding them close…I don't know why I suggested it, just forget about it!" said Amy in a rush.

Shadow seemed curious. He understood the gist of this "cuddling," but he wasn't sure why she had mentioned it in the first place, especially if it was meant to pacify both of them.

"How would that not bore you?"

Amy's eyes widened. "Well…usually couples do it so they can be close, and talk, and…" Blushing, Amy decided not to elaborate any further. She refused to go near the topic of kissing. "I just don't like being ignored…and I like being close to you…so it wouldn't bore me…"

Avoiding his gaze, she held her knees tightly, knowing that she had dug her own grave. How could it happen like this? Amy had been so careful, so considerate; how could she have slipped up this badly?

Shadow, on the other hand, was mulling over what Amy had just told him. It was true that he was hesitant when it came to physical contact, though recently, he had felt guiltier about it. His hesitance was largely due to tact—he didn't want to overstep any boundaries with Amy, as she meant a great deal to him. Shadow definitely wouldn't have dared to consider such things if they had just began their relationship—but now, as they became even closer, he was curious to see in what other ways he could feel close to her. Yet Shadow was ever insecure; he was aware of the worldwide perception of him being cold and resistant to touch. Shadow trusted Amy, however: he wouldn't mind Amy so close to him, if she was also comfortable with it.

He felt like her suggestion was permission enough, so he awkwardly climbed on top of the bed, sitting next to Amy, who was frozen in place.

"I don't mind your idea." Shadow tried to sound as confident as possible. Insecurity didn't match his image, after all.

Amy shyly looked at him, scanning for even the slightest reluctance. Inwardly, she felt a surge of excitement and delight. When she decided that Shadow was completely open to cuddling, she pounced on him unexpectedly and held him securely.

Shadow suddenly felt his heart skip a beat. She had certainly surprised him. He bashfully wrapped his arms around her, trying to be as gentle as possible. His girlfriend had buried her face in his chest; he could feel her smile, which was the strangest sensation he had ever felt. Shadow hoped she wouldn't come up for air any time soon, as he felt an accursed heat on his cheeks. It was unbecoming of him to act this way…he knew Amy would say it was the work of love. Shadow wasn't sure he was thrilled about love's work.

Falling in love with Amy Rose truly was a topic of mixed feelings for him. On one hand, he had never felt more at ease, being with someone who didn't judge him, who tried fervently to understand him, who never gave up on him. Conversely, he wasn't sure if it would last. No matter what Amy told him, Shadow felt he was, in essence, an unpleasant and unforgiving person. There was no way someone as altruistic and kind as Amy could stand being with him for too long. Shadow frequently braced himself for the end of their relationship. If it jeopardized Amy's happiness, he would grin and bear it. Shadow felt it wasn't intended for him to fall in love, anyway.

Yet at the same time, he couldn't imagine living a life without Amy's splendor. Of course, he could move on, as he did with Maria. He could devote his efforts entirely to making the world a better place, completely ridding himself of personal wants and needs. It was always intended that way: Shadow was created for the convenience of others, created as a weapon. There was never a question as to whether he himself would be happy. Shadow simply wasn't _meant_ to be happy, much less _loved_. So why did it bother him so, the idea of Amy leaving him? It occurred to Shadow that he just didn't _want_ to live without her, which was far more painful than _needing_ Amy in his life.

Shadow felt himself become despondent. He knew Amy would pick up on it right away.

And so she did. "Shadow? What's wrong?"

Shadow looked down to see her gazing at him concernedly. She held on to him tighter, which only made him feel more pain.

He looked away. "It's nothing."

"But you look really sad…is it something I said?" Amy tried to hide her desperation.

Shadow wasn't sure how he could approach this subject without hurting her. Yet he knew it was time for him to speak of these thoughts which pestered him day and night. "Amy. I'm not sure we should continue…what we're doing."

These words were a tiny ray of hope for Amy. "Cuddling, you mean? Why didn't you just say so, silly? I knew you wouldn't like it for too long—"

"No, it's not that. It's…our involvement."

When Shadow saw Amy's expression, seeing her very heart break, he regretted bringing up the subject at all, especially so insensitively. Perhaps it was appropriate, so that she could finally see him for what he truly was: heartless and cruel.

It wasn't as if Amy didn't see this coming. Amy thought she owed it to him not to cry.

However, what exactly upset him? He didn't seem upset at being close to her. No, Shadow was at peace like this, for all of five seconds, at least, before…he started thinking? Amy had already told him to stop thinking too much.

Amy tried her best to control herself. "What did I do? Why are you so upset?"

Sighing, Shadow cursed himself for misleading her. "You haven't done anything."

When Shadow didn't continue, Amy asked impatiently, "Then what? What's going on?"

Unbeknownst to him, Shadow had only held his arms tighter around Amy throughout this whole debacle, as if he refused to let her go, which only further confused Amy.

Shadow's eyes kept darting back and forth in uncertainty. "You can't honestly tell me that you will put up with me for too long. I've done very…questionable things. I may do more in the future. It would be cruelty to you to let this relationship continue."

He closed his eyes in acceptance of the end. Shadow tried to convince himself that it didn't matter to him. Amy was simply an outlet, a confidant…right? How could he, an artificial being, a _weapon_, ever know the authenticity, the selflessness of love? Perhaps he wasn't truly in love with her. It would make this whole ordeal much easier.

"Really? We've been friends for so long, and you still see yourself like that?"

Shadow opened his eyes and considered her. It was clear that she was attempting to keep herself from even sniffling. She was trying to be strong for him…as always.

"Shadow, I _know_ you. You're a very good person. I know you probably don't believe it, but I see right through you! It's one of my powers, y'know." Amy managed a tiny smile with great difficulty. "If you want proof, well, it's right here in front of you…"

Giving her a quizzical look, he timidly asked, "Where…?"

"Oh, well, maybe not really in front of you, but…here you are, trying to keep me happy! Even if you're going about it the wrong way…you still really care. And I can tell this has been eating at you for a long time. I'm only hurt you didn't tell me sooner. Or maybe _I_ should've noticed it…" Amy inched closer to him, as close as she felt was pertinent. She wanted to make up for her inattentiveness. "You know you can tell me anything, right? It's my job to listen because I love you!" She gave him the sweetest grin she could muster.

Shadow could hardly breathe. This definitely wasn't something he expected her to say. Amy Rose, love someone like him?

"You don't have to say things you don't mean, Amy."

Amy pouted. "I never say anything I don't mean! I love you, Shadow the Hedgehog! And I'll say it as many times as I need to!"

Before she could think about it thoroughly, Amy found herself meeting his lips in a kiss. Shadow definitely couldn't breathe anymore.

Shadow tried to move away, but Amy held his face in place; she knew he would just go on about how undeserving he was. That could wait.

The typically solemn hedgehog was suddenly completely flustered and taken aback. Sure, he had thought of kissing…once or twice. It was too embarrassing and _unbecoming_ of a thought for him to consider extensively. But now here he was, locking lips with Amy Rose. Shadow couldn't fathom how lips could be so soft, so warm, so _inviting_. He had always seen kissing as an awkward activity, but now it seemed more intimate than anything else. Shadow couldn't believe he was being so intimate with her; perhaps they had a chance after all?

Even though she was hurt by what Shadow had intended to do, she couldn't help reveling on how romantic this was. The typical romantic drama! Amy could have never dreamed of a moment like this. It was so impulsive, and that made it special to her. Amy hoped he thought the same.

When she finally released him, Amy giggled at his surprised expression. It _was_ their first kiss, after all.

Before Shadow could say anything (and he was in no position to, either way), Amy said, "Now, I don't want to hear you say anymore about how you're a bad person and you don't deserve me! The only thing I want to hear come out of that mouth is…something like, 'Amy, my love, my everything, how could I have been so wrong?'" Amy couldn't help laughing at her own impression. Kissing really _did_ take the edge off of things. Maybe she should do it with him more often…

Shadow just stared at her, considering her words, before snorting. "Hm, I don't suppose I'd be able to get rid of you even if I tried…" he teased.

"Darn right! I'm not letting you go that easy!"

"Is that so? How do you intend on keeping me, then?"

Amy grinned mischievously. "Let's see you fight your way out of _this!_" She latched on to him with new fervor, both her arms and legs wrapped around him securely. Her face found itself in his chest once again.

Shadow felt the air sucked out of him again. It was just like Amy to resort to bone-crushing hugs in times of distress. If only to persuade her to loosen her grip… "Very well…I surrender."


End file.
